Week 20 – If Just to Say

If Just to Say

Today in the field
A woman asked myself and my colleagues
If we were a women’s construction company
We told her we were scientists but
Part of me wanted to say yes
If just to say
Here we are
Here we work

We are not going anywhere.

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Week 19 – Stumble

Stumble

I am too good at beginnings.
They last so short, bursts of adrenaline sparking my heart when I see your name.

I feel wise beyond 23 years when I let things begin at the end,
Hope the way I leave you is better than a cold night in Hoboken, coat held to my chest, wondering when I got so lost.

It is so easy to smile at your butterflies.

Let me stumble into your arms.

Week 17 – I Could Write About the Rain

I Could Write About the Rain

I could write about the rain.

I could write about wet umbrellas,
About the keys in my coat pocket,
The puddles around the bean boots on my feet.

I could write about how for the first time in a long time, I am learning to trust my muscles.

I could write how I am learning, again, to swim.

Week 16 – These Mixed-Up Pieces, Part II

These Mixed-Up Pieces, Part II

The flames don’t last forever,
I tell myself, stitch the sinews and put each piece of china back in place.
I am a mosaic of mixed up pieces,
Of scars and lines and my life,
Tattooed to my heart like the sun across the sky, my story smoothed by time and a thousand eyes reading, reading.

I am a painting, built from layers, scrubbed over and made clean to be built again.

I am a survivor.